Returning to My Happy Places, after The Whipple.

In Sept 2023, I was in the process of making the decision to have, or not have The Whipple, I asked the surgeon “ Will I be able to ride my mountain bike after The Whipple?” I love riding my mountain bike, and being out in nature, it has helped me for years deal with living with Familial Adenomatous Polyposis (FAP). The surgeon told me I should make a full recovery, and able to live an active life. After hearing this I started to make a plan of how I would get through the surgery, and recovery. I was figuring 7 days in hospital, and 3 months at home, this seemed to be the standard. I had no idea it would be such a long difficult time.

One of the first things I did, in the month that was leading up to the surgery, was buy a flag with a happy face on it. Then took this on a mountain bike trip, spending time each day saluting the flag, starting the process of focusing on a positive outcome for the surgery. I was lucky to have my family, and friends in my life. I enlisted their help to keep me in a positive mind set. When things got rough, and I was very frustrated I had to lean on them for more energy. We talked about how this had to be a positive experience, even if the worst was to come, and not to dwell on the negative. I set up a What’s App chat group so I could keep in touch with my family, and friends that couldn’t be there.

The surgery went okay they tell me. I remember the first visit I had after the surgery, a group of my friends brought in a new happy flag, and hung on the curtain around my bed. I could look at each day, and remember what my goal was, to return to a happy, and active life. With in the first week post Whipple I developed several leaks, and then a stubborn fistula, the recovery started going very poorly. I had no idea at that time I would spend a total of 140 days in the hospital, 2 separate hospital stays with a 3 week period staying at friends place, and another 60 days with a NJ feeding tube at home once I was discharged. From the start I had a series of pictures, and personal memories, I called “My Happy Places”, that I dreamed of revisiting when I had recovered, and had the strength. Early on in the recovery it seemed easy to stay positive, but as the weeks went by I would have times I really struggled to stay positive, I was frustrated that the healing was taking too long. This is when I knew I had to talk to my family, and friends, look at “ My Happy Places” pictures, listen to music, and walk as much as I could. It wasn’t easy but I found small things to get me by, and worked hard as I could to get better. I started taking notes, and pictures so I could keep track each day of how things looked, and what was going on. I would see patterns, changes, or useful information I could share with my medical team, some of which proved very helpful. Now as I look back at what happened I am not always sure how I did it, but staying positive, and focusing on getting back to see "My Happy Places" must have had something to do with it. I know I am very fortunate to have so many great people in my life, great care from the Health Care workers, and my health. There was a lot more that could have gone wrong, or changed my quality of life, I owe the Universe a big THANK YOU. Cheers